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During and after college, I have maintained a diverse group of friends and have had the good fortune to travel to various places in Asia including a two year stint in Korea and Taiwan, as well as less extensive periods in Hong Kong, Japan, and mainland China.Moreover, I have dated both intra- and inter-racially (with Black women among others) and was most recently in a 3 year relationship with a Black American woman (who self-identified as such).Thus while one could potentially make a case for a relationship between a Black man and an Asian woman (the ostensibly most masculine with the ostensibly most feminine), a potential relationship between an Asian man and Black woman may seem laughable if not inconceivable.However, upon further interrogation we see how such an assessment is not just problematic, but entirely fallacious.Before getting into this, I will first state that I am in no way concerned with the Black women or Asian men who genuinely do not find each other sexually attractive for whatever reason.In other words, I’m not trying to take on the job of convincing Black women to give Asian men a chance who would not want to already (or vice versa). (At the same time I do always find it peculiar when I hear people say that they “just don’t find ‘group x’ attractive.” Can’t help but think it is more complex than that but hey…that’s just me.) I think that the reason for this potential concern stems mainly from the ways in ways in which I feel we are largely represented within American media and (pop) culture.



From there I found your other video to which I am responding.Either scenario could result in having to deal with the pressure to assimilate into mainstream American society (which is always synonymous with White in the US) or adhere to the cultural traditions of one’s sending country.(Thus, I am skeptical that this problem would not be potentially encountered by Black American women dating Greek, Italian, or even Nigerian men whose parents were urging them to do one or both of the above.)Finally, there is the concern that Asian men may only be interested in Asian women/may not be attracted to Black women.My dad is of mixed European ancestry and self-identifies as White, and my mom is half Puerto Rican and half Italian and identifies as multi-racial (however, she acknowledges that she can oftentimes pass for White and as such does benefit from White privilege).

I grew up in a predominantly White area and was one of the only Asian American students for the entirety of my grammar and high school career.

While I can see some potential obstacles which could prove to be problematic such as issues of colorism, the desire to maintain cultural traditions by dating within one’s own ethnic group, etc., if we interrogate the underlying reasons for their existence, it becomes increasingly evident that none are necessarily specific to the Asian American community and should therefore in no way discourage Black American women from considering Asian men as potential partners.