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No awkward bro hugs, no unwanted arm-over-the-shoulder moves, and he hadn’t yet tried to kiss me. He seemed a little embarrassed having told me all this, but I was actually glad to see a more human side of him. I hadn’t been hallucinating before – Bob actually was a very good kisser. Bob’s a friend” which would have transformed my guard dog into a dopey, waggling duffus – until and unless Bob stopped behaving like a friend.In fact, we’d usually go several weeks without either of us texting the other.He was also aware I was seeing other people and didn’t seem to care, though it wasn’t something we had really discussed.However, when he drove me home after date number 4, I knew I had to make a decision. After about an hour, he asked if I’d like a ride home, and I said yes without any trepidation. After a few minutes of making out in his car, he very tactfully asked, “Do you have to be at work early tomorrow? As it was, I simply told him to back off while I ushered Bob into my room. It did occur to me that he was the oldest person I’d been with.
He wasn’t expecting sex – I’d already laid in some major groundwork about having to get up early to go to LA – but if I just bolted the second he stopped the car the way I had previously, I was pretty sure he wouldn’t want to see me again. He did so, reluctantly, and Bob tried not to show his fear. He was only 7 years older than me, and I’d slept with a couple of dudes who were 9 years older, but that was many years before. In fact, all but one of them men I’d slept with since Martin had been younger than me.
Also, dating a responsible, sane adult who never wanted kids seemed a lot more practical than dating an anxious, unemployed artist who lived in his mother’s basement who also never wanted kids (which, might I add, was my most healthy relationship at that point). I was checked out with him, and I couldn’t figure out why. I was unexpectedly turned on, and when he asked, “are you sure you have to call it an early night? I’d put him off a few times, because I was pretty sure after the make-out session in his car, that I was going to have to decide whether to sleep with him, or cut him loose.
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